To my beautiful Daughter!
You are the most recent of my four most cherished blessings. Today as you turn two I reflect on the Joy you have brought to my life and that of your father and siblings. Who knew what an impact such an unexpected gift would make on our lives. I love you so much even when you jump of my couch, climb on my table and draw on the doors. You are learning and growing and I love you so much. I thank the Father for entrusting me with your care. I thank Him for giving me the name I love the most, Mommy!
Love Your Mommy!
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Moving Forward with Out Fear and Anxiety
I have a confession to make. It's something that I believe is personal to me but I have a feeling I'm not alone in this. I have suffered from a spirit of fear and anxiety for many years. It creeps and sneaks into my life when ever I let my guard down every time I think it's beat I turn and it's back ready to consume me again. I know that God did not give me the spirit of fear (2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV). This is not of God so I know that I need to let it go. I have struggled with this for several years. Worry and fear have consumed me at times and I have made bad decisions based on fear and not on faith.
It starts out with a small worry and when I don't give it to God and insist on handling it myself it gets bigger and bigger until it takes over my mind. My fears are typically about money, career, my children and my health. Sometimes they are based on a small storm in my life like an overdraft charge on my checking account. Other times it's a negative thought about something bad that MIGHT happen with the only evidence of a real threat coming from my own anxious mind.
At this point in my life I can't say that my life is anxiety free but it's getting there. I always keep in the fore front of my mind that their is no trial that I have gone through that I haven't been brought through. Their is no bad situation that I haven't been delivered from. If I'm still in it I'm still learning from it. I'm fairly young but the list is long and I expect that the list will get longer because every time I go through something I am reassured of God's presence in my life.
A question I ran across in Essence Magazine's January 2008 issue on the last pages of all pages was a question posed by Susan Taylor the Editorial Director. The Article entitled Heaven on Earth asked of the reader to ask themselves: How would I feel if I courageously let go of all anger and disappointment about the past and my fear and anxiety about the future? How would I seek, serve and love this year if I believed I was perfectly and permanently secure in the arms of God?
I realized that I've been holding on to anxiety. Asking God to take it away but yet at the same time refusing to give away the false security that anxiety gives me. Anxiety represents my inability to let go of the wheel and let Jesus take it. Praying for God to order my steps however not being in the word enough to know what He is trying to say. I keep trying to go at it alone and I don't need to. It's amazing how God has moved in my life when I just decided to be still.
I am safe in His arms and so are you!
Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”
It starts out with a small worry and when I don't give it to God and insist on handling it myself it gets bigger and bigger until it takes over my mind. My fears are typically about money, career, my children and my health. Sometimes they are based on a small storm in my life like an overdraft charge on my checking account. Other times it's a negative thought about something bad that MIGHT happen with the only evidence of a real threat coming from my own anxious mind.
At this point in my life I can't say that my life is anxiety free but it's getting there. I always keep in the fore front of my mind that their is no trial that I have gone through that I haven't been brought through. Their is no bad situation that I haven't been delivered from. If I'm still in it I'm still learning from it. I'm fairly young but the list is long and I expect that the list will get longer because every time I go through something I am reassured of God's presence in my life.
A question I ran across in Essence Magazine's January 2008 issue on the last pages of all pages was a question posed by Susan Taylor the Editorial Director. The Article entitled Heaven on Earth asked of the reader to ask themselves: How would I feel if I courageously let go of all anger and disappointment about the past and my fear and anxiety about the future? How would I seek, serve and love this year if I believed I was perfectly and permanently secure in the arms of God?
I realized that I've been holding on to anxiety. Asking God to take it away but yet at the same time refusing to give away the false security that anxiety gives me. Anxiety represents my inability to let go of the wheel and let Jesus take it. Praying for God to order my steps however not being in the word enough to know what He is trying to say. I keep trying to go at it alone and I don't need to. It's amazing how God has moved in my life when I just decided to be still.
I am safe in His arms and so are you!
Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Ain't God Great!!
Today is one of those days where I'm just feeling emotional about all the blessing God bestows upon his people. I mean isn’t our Father Awesome! Isn't he Excellent! (Those aren’t questions) As I woke this morning I had a song in my heart. I’d have more than a song in my heart I had a voice but I'm getting over a mild case of the flu "Thank the LORD!!" I was watching this reality show; really kind of weird that my husband recorded. Contestants on this reality program went to a Children's Hospital in Nashville and participated in music therapy with some seriously ill children. Well there was a scene where a mother was sobbing. She was told that her baby was not going to make it through the night. She was devastated and her sob tore though my heart. I was watching it feeling awful on a variety of levels. On one level there were several children going though debilitating and terminal illness and I felt they were being exploited for a meaningless television show. Secondly the children themselves by the deteriorating condition of their bodies expressed most definitely the seriousness of their lives situations. The grave pending outcomes were clear. I have children and it hit me in the gut that these parents were in the midst of some of the darkest days of their lives. As a mother how could you not feel this? However as I sat feeling emotionally distraught about the dying baby the show ended. The host of the show came in at the end and expressed that the baby that was not expected to make it though the night made a miraculous full recovery and was back at home with her parents. Praise God. Placing my hands in the air I just had to praise the Lord as tears welled up in my eyes. Isn't it wonderful that God can utilize a goofy reality show to reiterate to who ever is listening that He is STILL in control! God continues showing up and intervening in our situations making the seemingly impossible, possible. When they made that show they could never have known what the larger picture was going to be. Imagine how many people witnessed this miracle when all they thought they were getting was some mindless entertainment. Ain’t God Great!!!
Friday, February 15, 2008
Happy Birth Day AJ
To my handsome son!
Happy birthday Sweetie! I remember your first day of Kindergarten because at the time you were my youngest child and it devastated me so much to see my baby getting bigger. I am so proud of the young man you are becoming. Thank you for being a great big brother to your little sisters. Try not to drive your older brother crazy. Remember always that Jesus loves you and I love you too.
Love you forever!
Mommy
Happy birthday Sweetie! I remember your first day of Kindergarten because at the time you were my youngest child and it devastated me so much to see my baby getting bigger. I am so proud of the young man you are becoming. Thank you for being a great big brother to your little sisters. Try not to drive your older brother crazy. Remember always that Jesus loves you and I love you too.
Love you forever!
Mommy
Hello
I'm very new to blogging but find it incredibly interesting. Well, to start I'm a mother of 4 very beautiful children ranging in age nearly 2 - 15 yeas of age. I am also a full time child therapist who works at several urban public schools for a mental health agency. I am extremely stressed right now because I'm finding it increasingly hard to juggle full time work and my family. All you praying folks pray me up.
I also have a very handsome, intelligent, spitirual and loving husband who I have been married to for nearly 13 years. We are high school sweethearts and it is nothing short of a miricle that we have made it this far and are deeply in love. Bless the Lord!!!
As for Hobbies, I have many interests and little time to do any of them. The only thing besides family that I make time for is praising God I am involved in a couple of ministries at my church and I make time for bible study.
Other things I enjoy doing is writing, reading, knitting, and woud love to take a jewlry making workshop.
Well considering I am home with what feels like a mild flu (I had a flu shot) I think I'll get some sleep.
Amarie
I also have a very handsome, intelligent, spitirual and loving husband who I have been married to for nearly 13 years. We are high school sweethearts and it is nothing short of a miricle that we have made it this far and are deeply in love. Bless the Lord!!!
As for Hobbies, I have many interests and little time to do any of them. The only thing besides family that I make time for is praising God I am involved in a couple of ministries at my church and I make time for bible study.
Other things I enjoy doing is writing, reading, knitting, and woud love to take a jewlry making workshop.
Well considering I am home with what feels like a mild flu (I had a flu shot) I think I'll get some sleep.
Amarie
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